As a married man of my age with the question of whether to have or not to have children behind me, with only teenage sons who will have to deal with a very different form of the question of whether or not to have or not have children than if they were my teenage daughters, my opinion on reproductive rights has somewhat limited relevance. I do weigh in from time to time on political topics though. And so not saying something about yesterday’s leaked SCOTUS decision on Roe v Wade seems more purposeful than simply not believing my opinion relevant. So, in the interest of not repeating what will be said better and more appropriately by others, I’ll say something that not that many people can say about it instead.
You are one of the rare men that I know capable of really seeing how life is different for women than it is for men. I’ve seen you “see” and write about how a woman’s success comes at a far greater cost than for men. And I’ve seen and felt the reverence you have for your female colleagues, your wife … You get the struggle far more than most. And you react to it with respect. And while I could go off on the topic of abortion, and a woman’s right to choose, the basis of Roe was the declaration that women had the same right to their agency, their freedom, as men. To me, this is not a fight about abortion. It’s a fight about human rights, equal rights. In a world where it’s tough enough to be female, striking down Roe Is the ultimate fuck you, the ultimate act of control that springs from an entrenched, and yes I’ll say it, white male system. This whole week I have vacillated between rage and despair. My daughter says it’s the “sacred rage” women feel about injustice. I pray that enough of us will move that rage into action. “Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned“ … we just have to keep believing we have the power to drive change.
Well said, and agreed; especially: "They see him and feel compelled to help; to be charitable. To be better versions of themselves in service". Frankly, I doubt I could do what you're doing, though I'd hope "caring for him day in and day out destroyed the selfish and materialistic child of a man that I was" would work for me, too - I've thought a lot about this question and the risk of having such a child scares the crap out of me, and the unknowables being what they'd be, I doubt I could go through with it, and I feel bad about that.
Your ability to be vulnerable, humble and honest never ceases to amaze me. Being a 54 year old of mom of young twins, I too learned how to be less selfish and more giving. It was a hard lesson after living half my life single with only myself to care for. Thank you for this.
You are one of the rare men that I know capable of really seeing how life is different for women than it is for men. I’ve seen you “see” and write about how a woman’s success comes at a far greater cost than for men. And I’ve seen and felt the reverence you have for your female colleagues, your wife … You get the struggle far more than most. And you react to it with respect. And while I could go off on the topic of abortion, and a woman’s right to choose, the basis of Roe was the declaration that women had the same right to their agency, their freedom, as men. To me, this is not a fight about abortion. It’s a fight about human rights, equal rights. In a world where it’s tough enough to be female, striking down Roe Is the ultimate fuck you, the ultimate act of control that springs from an entrenched, and yes I’ll say it, white male system. This whole week I have vacillated between rage and despair. My daughter says it’s the “sacred rage” women feel about injustice. I pray that enough of us will move that rage into action. “Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned“ … we just have to keep believing we have the power to drive change.
Well said, and agreed; especially: "They see him and feel compelled to help; to be charitable. To be better versions of themselves in service". Frankly, I doubt I could do what you're doing, though I'd hope "caring for him day in and day out destroyed the selfish and materialistic child of a man that I was" would work for me, too - I've thought a lot about this question and the risk of having such a child scares the crap out of me, and the unknowables being what they'd be, I doubt I could go through with it, and I feel bad about that.
Your ability to be vulnerable, humble and honest never ceases to amaze me. Being a 54 year old of mom of young twins, I too learned how to be less selfish and more giving. It was a hard lesson after living half my life single with only myself to care for. Thank you for this.